It is very devastating when the Lord searches our hearts, and this is the way it should be. It leads to repentance and the exalting of the Lord, and it creates a deep hunger and thirst for righteousness to come forth.
Sometimes a man thinks that a change of scenery will make him more spiritual, but it certainly will not alter the level of his victory in God. It will be necessary for God to work His victory within him, and this will become a deep and very disturbing experience. The sons of God who are to be manifested in this age are going to be disciplined in the ways of the Lord. Many brothers who came out of deep sin and moved into the grace of God experienced freedom and liberty; but they did not have a deep consciousness of sin, of righteousness, and of the judgment to come. However, now the Holy Spirit is making these things real to those who seek to walk with God.
Any growth today without a corresponding measure of deep repentance and heartsearching will be absolute folly. A man who builds without a sure foundation will rise, only to fall miserably. Why go very far, only to have something stop you from the perfect will of God? Open your heart to the peril of losing your own personal fear of the Lord. Along with all your love and sacrifice for Him, let the fear of the Lord be continually before you. Never lose the fear of the Lord.
It is not adequacy in ministry that the Lord wants nearly as much as our relationship to Him. There we face the issue of how we are relating to God. Whether or not a man can preach is no criterion for the growth of a New Testament church. The pastors of the fastest growing churches are not necessarily the best preachers; but they are men who walk close to God.
When persecutions come let them be unjustified, as far as any offense on our part is concerned. Though the enemy may bring many accusations against us in our walk with God, let it be that we are walking blameless in the sight of the Lord, having done all that we can to provide things honestly in the sight of men (II Corinthians 8:21). Let a hunger and thirst for righteousness be kindled within our hearts. Above everything else, let there be a consuming desire to walk with God. Being able to go through the mechanics of ministry—to minister, to prophesy, or even to perform miracles and do mighty signs and wonders—is not enough for a walk with God. However, some brothers may be so intent on having a humble walk with God that they have a certain reluctance to enter into believing for spectacular miracles and the signs that follow. If in their hearts they simply do not want to do anything that would appear spectacular, it may be that God will have to bring them to an acceptance of walking in miracles. The time is upon God’s people when miracles will no longer be a luxury, but a necessity for survival.
Psalm 51 is sometimes called a contrite sinner’s prayer for pardon. Note the various words for wrongdoing, such as transgression, iniquity, and sin. In each case, they come from different words in Hebrew. Be gracious to me, O God, according to Thy loving-kindness; according to the greatness of Thy compassion blot out my transgressions. Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin. For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me. Against Thee, Thee only, I have sinned, and done what is evil in Thy sight, so that Thou art justified when Thou dost speak, and blameless when Thou dost judge. Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin my mother conceived me. Verses 1–5.
From these first verses, we see that the psalmist was aware that he was a sinner. This gives the foundation for the rest of the Psalm. We will emphasize verses 6, 9, 10, 12, and 17, because they contain certain truths to which we must give a priority in our thinking. Certain things must be ever before us. It is assumed that this is a psalm of David, written when Nathan the prophet came to him after he had sinned with Bathsheba; therefore this is probably the adulterer’s repentant prayer.
Regardless of what your sin may be, no doubt this Psalm will meet your need. If your sin is adultery, you will know that it is especially appropriate; but if it is some other sin, you can still apply it because behind these verses is the fact that the sinner is aware of certain principles which should be held in his conscious thought continually.
Behold, Thou dost desire truth in the innermost being, and in the hidden part Thou wilt make me know wisdom. Verse 6. This is where a walk with God starts. Before a believer is to be concerned about reaching the world and giving people the living Word of truth, God first wants that vessel to be filled with truth in his innermost being. In the hidden part God will cause him to know wisdom. It is down inside that this is necessary. You can know many things with your mind; but when they become real to your heart, then you know the truth from that moment on. It is down in the innermost being, down in the heart, that God will bring forth the realization of every truth. You can believe something without really knowing it, until one day the truth of it strikes you deep down inside so hard that for the first time you begin to realize what God wants. As a concept, it may have been explained to you repeatedly, but suddenly you really know it. It becomes real to you!
All truth is revealed like that—not only truth regarding iniquity, but also the truth of righteousness. A man may have a promise from God concerning his life, but it may be a long time before the awareness of what it really means reaches his heart in a deep revelation. Many people know in their minds that God’s Spirit is moving in the earth today to bring forth His restoration in the whole universe. However, this truth has not become a reality to their hearts. The day that it dawns on them and they see the plan of God and their part in it within their innermost beings, until it totally engulfs them, they will suddenly exclaim, “Isn’t it fabulous what God is doing!”
There is no better cure for being self-absorbed, self-conscious, or focused within, than to have God suddenly show us, as miserable and small as we are, exactly where we fit into His great program. It becomes an overwhelming experience. No man who truly sees his place in God can ever be proud. He will be humble as long as he lives, praising God for the greatness of that which He does through such an unworthy channel.
In verses 7 and 8, David said, Purify me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. Make me to hear joy and gladness, let the bones which Thou hast broken rejoice. Only certain somber tones ever reach the heart that has been cut off from God through sin. That is why, later on in the Psalm, David said, “Restore to me the joy of Thy salvation.” He knew that when God restores a man, he becomes sensitive to the moving of the Spirit which causes him to sing.
Paul and Silas must have experienced that when they were in prison. Not only were they in much pain after having been beaten, but they were bound uncomfortably in stocks. They could also have been anticipating dire results from the riot in Philippi; yet they were singing psalms and praises to God. When the heart is in tune with God, it is impossible not to express joy. When the heart is out of tune, even the most favorable circumstances can leave a person altogether miserable.
When you wake up in the morning feeling discouraged and depressed, do not blame someone else or your circumstances; instead take a peek within and check your relationship with the Lord. You may not have done anything bad, but probably you have neglected doing what you should have. There are sins of omission, and if you neglect something long enough, you lose your tender sensitivity to God.
The peril of losing our personal fear of the Lord and our personal relationship to Him is very serious. Therefore, in verses 9 and 10, David cried out to the Lord, Hide Thy face from my sins, and blot out all my iniquities. Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. On the surface, these two verses seem opposed to each other. First David was saying, “I want you to look the other way, Lord. Do not look at my sins.” Then he cried, “Create in me a clean heart, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.” These verses are not actually incompatible. When God hides His face from your sins, it does not mean that He is going to overlook them. It means, rather, that He is not going to focus upon your sins; instead He is going to focus upon His eternal purpose for your life.
David was crying, “O God, don’t look at my miserable state, but look within Your heart and find what You thought of me before the foundation of the world! Show me what You really thought of me, Lord, so that I truly know that You love me. Then I will know how great Your concern is for me, and that You will create in me a clean heart and renew a steadfast spirit within me.”
If a man fails God in any way, even if only in the meditation of his heart, something within his spirit becomes passive or withdrawn; and he loses his steadfastness of spirit. In contrast, a man who has faith to believe God for righteousness is being aggressive. Compare repenting in a mild manner with repenting as David did, when he lifted up his voice with weeping and crying until the sun went down and he had no more power to weep.
Effective repentance is not dependent upon the intensity of the emotion; however, the depth of a man’s faith is questionable if he does not summon the intensity of his emotions into the expression of his faith. If his faith is to be expressed toward God, let him do it with all his heart. We might question a man’s professed love for God if it is not expressed with an intensity of his faith and emotions. In Luke 10:27, we read, … Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy mind; and thy neighbour as thyself. If you are going to serve God, then really serve Him with all your heart. Love Him with the intensity and the force of all of your emotions, and with a real faith speak the truth from your heart. Like David, let us cry, “O God, renew that steadfast spirit within us. Renew our determination. Bring it forth until we speak violently of our love for You!”
Let us love quiet worship. Let us love times in which we communicate with the Lord, even without the necessity of words. Let us love the still small voice which can make our souls shudder like earthquakes on the mountain. Yet there is something more. Let us also love to stand and shout forth His praises joyfully! We can have that joy if our hearts are right with God.
David cried, Make me to hear joy and gladness, let the bones which Thou hast broken rejoice. He was talking like a little sheep to his Shepherd, and he was saying, “Lord, let the suffering end. You made Your point when You broke my leg with Your staff, so that I would learn not to wander from the flock. Heal me and let me hear the joy of Your voice again. Let me not feel the pain that resulted from my own iniquity. Heal me, that the bones that You have broken may rejoice again.”
Do not cast me away from Thy presence, and do not take Thy Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of Thy salvation, and sustain me with a willing spirit. Verses 11–12. How many times have you wrongly evaluated a person who has failed God? What if there were a meter to measure the enormity and the force of what you do every time you sin? God does not evaluate men’s sins the way people do. Sin is sin in the sight of God, but probably He is more concerned when you fall into the trap of the enemy and he tampers with the willing spirit within you. Then your spirit, which should aggressively serve God and do His will, becomes passive. How God hates that! Because of that withdrawing spirit within, you will be the last to volunteer for any task instead of entering in wholeheartedly.
We do not know how closely akin laziness is to nearly every sin. There is a saying that an idle mind is the devil’s workshop, but this is only touching the surface of a truth. The passivity in a person’s spirit, the failure to press in and aggressively seek the will of the Lord, will allow temptation to steal over his heart and lead him into iniquity.
It is good for a man to work with his hands. If he does not have much to do, there will be a certain tendency within him to be undisciplined; and he will not be directed of the Holy Spirit as he should be. Work is related to faith. Faith without works is dead (James 2:17). A certain deadness is found in a man’s faith and in his ministry if he is not willing to roll up his sleeves and work, even if it is a menial task. As the days of the Kingdom unfold, we will find that God will sanctify the most menial task that is done in His name with faith. There is a great need for everyone who wants to do the will of the Lord to draw back from an ambition to be in full-time ministry. Much good ministry comes forth through men who are not in full-time ministry. Only after they become overwhelmed with responsibilities should they finally withdraw from earning their own living to be supported by the church.
God blesses the man who has a willing spirit. Let there be no withdrawal or passivity in your thinking. A withdrawing spirit is the open door to transgressions that can overtake those who walk with God. A man may excuse himself, saying that he was overtaken by an old fault or a sin from the past, and that his yielding to it again became the cause of his downfall. This is rather doubtful, for there are men who would lay down their lives rather than be caught in the pit from which they were dug. What causes a man of God to fall into sin? Somewhere along the line he loses that fervency in his spirit to serve God. This, of course, affects his revelation of God’s will.
A man never becomes discouraged and looks at the faults of others to a point of giving up, unless he first loses his willing spirit. A man with a willing spirit, who is truly pressing in to the Lord, cannot be discouraged. If most of his brothers fall as sinners before God’s face, he still will not fall as long as he retains a willing spirit. What your brother does has no relevancy as far as you are concerned, unless you have lost that willing spirit and Satan is then able to reach your mind. True revelation flourishes when a man’s spirit is aggressive to follow hard after the Lord. Deception rages when a man has lost his willing spirit and draws back from the Lord.
This prayer of David takes us one step further.… sustain me with a willing spirit. Then I will teach transgressors Thy ways, and sinners will be converted to Thee. Deliver me from bloodguiltiness, O God, Thou God of my salvation; then my tongue will joyfully sing of Thy righteousness. O Lord, open my lips, that my mouth may declare Thy praise. For Thou dost not delight in sacrifice, otherwise I would give it; Thou art not pleased with burnt offering. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and a contrite heart, O God, Thou wilt not despise. Psalm 51:12–17.
Behind this prayer we see the truth that David saw. He knew that he could not go back and atone for what he had done, simply by bringing sacrifices to be slain at the altar of the Tabernacle. David was saying, “Lord, I know this is not what You really want. You are not pleased with just a burnt offering. No matter what I would present before You, it would not be enough. Lord, You must find something else in me—an acceptable sacrifice of a broken spirit, a broken and a contrite heart.”
Where there is no evidence of a broken spirit before the Lord, a man’s walk with God is in danger. How can a man know the heart of God unless his own heart is broken? How can a man communicate with the Lord unless his own spirit is broken? A certain kind of antagonism exists between an arrogant spirit and God. James 4:6 tells us that God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble. Something within the very nature of God stands against everyone who is arrogant in his spirit. Anyone who stands without a brokenness before the Lord will find God’s dealings upon him to be different from what he anticipated. How will a man see God smile upon him, except as he looks at God through a lens of tears. Then he will see Him plainly. A man cannot cry without being able to see God. A man cannot repent and be broken without finding God’s hand upon him. How can a man receive a revelation of truth when he is so busy that he loses the consciousness of his brokenness and unworthiness before God.
These truths in the fifty-first Psalm are the basis of a man’s ministry coming forth worthily. Human success, as well as knowledge and revelation that a man receives, tends to puff up his self-esteem. Never ask God to show you something unless you also pray, “Lord, show me how much I have yet to learn.” Never seek to learn things just so that you will be puffed up with a sense of knowledge. Always be open to see how much you have yet to learn. Pray that any areas of ignorance and need will be revealed to you continually. As God gives you wisdom, pray for more insight concerning what you do not know and do not have. Only in this way can you walk before the Ancient of Days, in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge (Colossians 2:3). You cannot walk before Him, knowing all the answers that you need to know, until first your heart is broken and humbled before Him by constantly remembering how little you really know.
It is not enough just to cry out for God to forgive you for all the things you have done wrong. You must see the peril of losing your consciousness of God and the awareness of your relationship before Him, and of having the fear of the Lord depart from your heart.
A man who has a true hunger after God also fears Him. As he loves God and acknowledges that his life is His for whatever He wants, the fear of the Lord is ever before him. Along with all his fear, even his dread of God, he will find himself loving God so much that he will wrestle with Him, as Jacob did, for a blessing. He will cry before Him through the night, just to have that blessing and the revelation of His love.
How fierce must be the intensity in our hearts to seek after God and to have a brokenness in our spirits! We who are in Christ, in this hour, must be ready for the deepest revelation of the Lord we have ever received. We cannot walk mechanically in a prescribed way; we must know Him and walk with Him. Pity those who work for God just for money or a place. Work for something greater—a walk with the Lord.
Do you want to know God’s voice and walk with Him, so that at every move you will hear His voice behind you saying, “This is the way; walk ye in it,” when you turn to the right hand and when you turn to the left (Isaiah 30:21). Then be afflicted; mourn and weep. Come before Him. Seek His face. Cry out for His righteousness! Your sacrifices must be a broken spirit, a broken and a contrite heart. Though it seems like a small and feeble offering, like the barley loaves and fishes which Jesus broke, it may be enough to feed a multitude. Anything that you put in His hand becomes a miracle if it is broken and blessed. No one needs to tell you how to pray. You already know enough to stand and lift your hands to the Lord and start calling upon His name, if it is in your heart to do it.