I do not know of anything that I have ever taught that God has not burned in my spirit first. When you hear it, you know that I have already experienced it deeply. I could not talk you into anything at all if I did not know the truth of it within the depths of my own spirit.
The built-in tendency we have to define the limits of our dedication to the Lord is so carnal. We have built-in walls and we say, “I will not go any further. I will not do any more.” You will do more! God will lay it on you. You are going to do anything He wants you to do. God is not kidding. When He is out for disciples, He is out for disciples—and that is what He is going to get. There can be no holdouts.
In our walk with the Lord, we must face the ever increasing demands the Lord makes on us. People back off when God starts putting the screws on them and says, “Come on, you intended to be a disciple; now be one!” And it certainly is not easy.
It is easy to stand on the sideline and give all kinds of advice to others, but when it comes to laying down your own life, that is another thing. I know what I am going to do. Three times I have heard a word from the Lord that I will give my life for the Lord. I have talked about living into the Kingdom, but I know I am going to be a martyr. I cannot help it if there is something compulsive about my preaching from this time on. The Lord made real to me that in everything I do I must prepare all the churches as though it were the last day I would be with them. There is so much work yet to be done, and I do not know how to get it done. I do know I am going to seek the Lord more earnestly. There will be a time when it will be very much to your advantage that I be out of the way. Already we see the coming signs of that, because people look more and more to me instead of taking the initiative to walk with the Lord as they should. God will not let that happen.
The moment will come in which you will say, “Lord, it is not the ministries; it is Your hand upon my life, Your demand upon me that I answer. I am Your bondservant; I am Your handmaiden Lord, ready to do whatever You want me to do. You will help me to expand, and as Your demands upon me increase I will live less and less for myself and more and more for You.” I know that is the course. I have watched my own personal life diminish, as dreams and expectations of things I have wanted in life disappear one by one. I am swallowed up by something more, until the ministry I give and what Christ is doing through me is all that matters. We cannot draw back. We must give it all to Him. We are just not our own. We belong to the Lord; He bought us. I do not have any right to myself and neither do you.
Upon us rests so much—to give and to bless and to proclaim the word of the Lord to the ends of the earth. What marvelous beginnings have come from this people that God has raised up in whom the word of the Lord has rested. How many different peoples and tongues will arise and bless you. The Lord stir each one of you from your passivity and make you realize what He has called you to be and fill you with the spirit of giving and grace in the name of the Lord. Let every heart be prepared to deny itself and forsake all to follow the Lord. Let every offering be a sacrifice unto Him. It is into the nail-scarred hands that we give—what we have and what we are.
“Who is this coming up from the wilderness, leaning on her beloved?” Song of Solomon 8:5. The only way we can make it in our weakness and our devotion to the Lord is by leaning heavily upon Him to bring us out of the wilderness. Why doesn’t the Lord remove the pressures from us? Why does He demand a Bride with a broken heart? Why does He crush His people after He has gone to such lengths to bring forth the bloom and the fragrance in the rose of their lives? Who is this that comes up out of this wilderness—the wilderness of Babylon, of generations of pressure—leaning on the arm of her Beloved?
I understand a little about the Lord’s demands. This message speaks to us, not about the flesh and the lust thereof, not about the pride of life or the lust of the eyes—those things are of the world—but rather about some deep thing in our spirit that refuses to comprehend or accept the ever-increasing demands of God upon us. How many casualties there have been because some drew back when God demanded a little more than He had before. We thought we had something that would give us a comfortable, rather fulfilling and rewarding life. Then we watched, as by His Spirit He eroded it away, until we were standing on nothing but pure committal to the Lord.
We think of Paul’s statement that out of his weakness God’s strength was made perfect (II Corinthians 12:9). I do not understand all that happened to Paul, but I know the Lord kept laying more and more demands upon him all the time. When he was about to be imprisoned, he said, “What do you mean by breaking my heart? I am not only willing to go to Jerusalem, but to give my life for the Lord” (Acts 21:13). Only one thing moved him. The prophets in every city told him he would be imprisoned. Still he said, “I must fulfill my ministry with joy.” With joy? in a Roman prison? beaten? with rioters and mobs ready to tear him apart? He wrote from a damp cell in prison, “Timothy, preach the word. Make full proof of your ministry. The time of my departure is at hand. I fought a good fight; I kept the faith; I finished the course” (II Timothy 4:2;5–7).
“O cloud of witnesses, behold us and strengthen us. Entreat the Lord for us, that we walk worthy of this hour in which we live, to be the disciples of the Kingdom, to do the will of the Lord.”
Who is this that cometh up out of the wilderness leaning on the arm of her Beloved? O limping saints, bruised and wounded and stripped—fight the good fight, finish the course, keep the faith. In this age of softness, many of us are beginning to realize that the Lord has reversed all the trends, and He is producing people who are the toughest followers of the Lord, and they stay with it. Discipleship is returning again.
The Lord’s coming is at hand. Why are people so reluctant to give the Lord what He asks? What are you trying to prove? What are you trying to save? Take your talent and put it in a napkin and bury it, and every time you sit down you will feel the fires of hell beginning to come towards you. You cannot do it! You just cannot give Him anything less than everything you are—all of it.
What about the tendency of the human mind to define the limits of its endurance and the limits of the demands of love? Remember how Peter came to the Lord and said, “How oft shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? until seven times” (Matthew 18:21)? What is the limit of human endurance? How long shall we be assaulted psychically and spiritually by devil forces and those round about us or related to us? How long shall we be patient? Shall we forgive seven times? seventy times seven? “Lord, increase our faith, because we have a tendency to define the limitations of our spirit and of our mind.” We are reluctant to accept the fact that God can demand more of us than we believe possible. Finally the mind shrieks, “I can’t! I have reached the limit, Lord.” But as our spirit says, “Thy will be done,” we know that we have to do a little more than we thought we could ever do.
How difficult are the demands of God that reach into our own self-interests. The prophet walks by and says, “Would you bake me a cake?” and you say, “I have only enough meal for one little pancake for my son and myself, and then we die.” “Make me a cake first.” The human mind says, “If I give this to God, I perish; I lose myself; I lose my identity. What am I if I do what God demands?” And the Lord replies, “…If any one wishes to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me.” Matthew 16:24. We are overwhelmed when we realize that we must lay down the limitations we have imposed on how much, how long, how far, how deep. We cannot put any limitations on anything. How much shall I love Him? How long shall I love Him? How deep shall I love Him? It is so human for us to put up limitations and say, “I think I could go thus far.” Ah, you can go that far and further—and with His gentle wooing you will go further still, on and on. “Those who follow the Lamb whithersoever He goeth, love not their lives unto death” (Revelation 14:4;12:11). O Lord, let us all be included in that. Those of you who have been the withdrawn, uninvolved disciples—give Him your heart. Please give Him your heart! There was no limitation to what He did for you. There does not seem to be any limit in what He is demanding of you, either.
Who is this that cometh up out of the wilderness? O God, it is us. And we are leaning on You, Lord. “If anyone comes to Me, and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be My disciple.” Luke 14:26. Lord, we hate our selfishness, our instinct of self-preservation. We would demand of ourselves, “Give yourself wholly to the Lord. All my soul and all that is within me, yield yourself into His hand.” Let there be no reluctance. Let there not be among us a Lot’s wife who looks back. Let there not be among us those who put their hand to the plow and look back, for they are not fit for the Kingdom of God. Jesus said, “Whoever does not carry his own cross and come after Me cannot be My disciple.” Luke 14:27.
These ever-increasing demands of God upon us require a discipleship without reservation which is progressive in nature, for we know that tomorrow He will ask of us something we could not say yes to today; but we know also that tomorrow we will say yes. We are what we are by the grace of God and that is the way we will prevail. We have such a tendency to try to define, consciously or unconsciously, the limits and the boundaries. You cannot. You cannot describe the worship that is going to come. You cannot describe the way people will minister. You cannot describe the things God will demand of us. You have no way of knowing. Only in the heart of God is the knowledge that He has of us: what He is going to expect and ask of us, what He will do for us, and what He will do through us.
O cheerful throng that will die as martyrs, O happy company prevailing over principalities and powers (and only God knows what those battles will be, though we know the beginning of them), which would you rather do—suffer the tortures of a martyr or stay around and go through the battles and pressures of satanic warfare? It is not yours to decide anyway; God will choose for you. He said of Paul, “I will show him what great things he must suffer for My name’s sake.” He told Ananias, “Lay hands on him and heal him, that he may receive his sight again. He is My chosen vessel” (Acts 9:12,16). Many things happened to Paul: he was whipped and stoned, yet he fought a good fight; he kept the faith and finished the course.
Where are you, O brothers of great promise, who rejoiced in the word of the Lord and knew it was something unique in all the earth? Yet you left us. In hours of testing and pressure you said, “These are the limits. I will not go any further.” God forbid that we have anything in our heart which, under pressure, will suddenly cause us to draw back. How can we keep on going? I found my heart crying to the Lord, “God, give grace.” I want to go on with all my heart. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.
“O holy Christ, intercede for us, that in this hour of grace You will meet our hearts.”
Can we come to grips with the limitations we have in our minds? We can and we must! I have promises from the Lord that are very great. I know they will be fulfilled, but that has nothing to do with God’s demands on my life. They will be there just the same. This progressive nature of discipleship is very disturbing.
How can you build a church when you cannot even tell the people what God will expect of them? How can you build a church when you do not even know yourself what it will mean? When I came into the revelation of this walk with God and was turned out of my denomination, one of the presbyters asked, “What will all this lead to?” In my innocence, I sat and worshiped. I could not answer him then and I still could not answer him today. I do not know what it will lead to. I hear you saying, “Leader, tell us where you are leading us?” I don’t know. I do not even know what He wants from me. How can I tell you what He wants from you? All I can tell you is that from the days of my youth I have walked with the Lord, and in all those years I have never known a time that God was not pushing me into something more than I was prepared for. I found myself lost, saying, “Lord, speak; Your servant hears. What do you want, Lord?” This move has come by God’s Spirit upon the earth and no man can tell you where it will lead. You do not know what darkness and battles will come upon the earth, what victories, what intercession. Paul writes in Galatians 6:9: And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not. Although his exhortation may sound trite, it is all I can tell you. Don’t back off from it. It is going to be real.
The Lord has told me to delegate some of my duties. I will do it because the Lord told me to, but He is not fooling me for a minute. I am not letting go of a difficult situation to pick up an easy one. I know what He has in mind—more of His ever-increasing demands. I will let go and I will bare my spirit before Him and say, “Speak, Lord.” Always more faith is demanded until sometimes I feel as if I am standing all alone on a high cold mountain peak, barely able to hang on, as the wind blows violently.
More demands are made for love until it seems one does not know how to love anymore or what to do for the people. Then He demands more strength. Where does it come from? How can we draw on it for more ministry? I minister to many, many people, but some who are appointed to crucial positions such as ministries with a commission, should have priority. Surely God will give us the grace for these unlimited demands He makes upon us, as they steadily increase: the demands on our time, demands of more dedication, demands of ability we do not have. Everyone comes to me with questions and problems, and often I want to say, “Who do you think I am? I am just a man made of the same mud you are.” But I don’t dare. I look to the Lord, for in Him are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge, believing He will help me to come up with a little more ability, a little more wisdom. God give us the grace not to define the limits of our endurance. God give us the grace not to define the limits of our love or our dedication to Him. God teach us how to say an unconditional yes to all that He says or will say to us.
Think very seriously and pray most earnestly about this message. Ask the Lord to show you where you are placing your limits. Whether you grasp it or not, this is very much a word from the Lord.